Dissapointment

It is unfortunate that unhappiness is a fact intrinsic to life-but such a fact is one that is, to me,  undeniable. Disappointment and upsets occur when there is a dissociation between what is expected and what is true. As such I find myself growing pessimistic-reclining to the serenity of low expectations. Even with such a noble prospect in mind, as a human it quickly became apparent that optimism and hope may be feelings that are intrinsic to our very existence. When I found out that I neither got into Berkeley or UCLA I felt that it was the expected outcome-but the human side of me still exhibited a peculiar sense of irrational despair despite my already low expectations. I was angry at my own incompetency, my lack of talent, and my overall mediocrity and as such fell into a state of depressive introspection. My discontent multiplied to such a degree that I turned to physical torment to alleviate my inner stress. It may not be wise to assess my own actions and attitude as it has only been a week, however, at this point in time I feel as though my negativity and physical outburst is justifiable to an extent. Society has a tendency to categorize and discriminate-consistently applying pressure upon those who don't fit the norm. My actions may characterize "craziness" or "depression" through the scopes of society but in my perception my actions were an act of rational self interest-simply an incurring of physical pain to alleviate a sensation of inner guilt and eternal despair-despair that is arguably far more tormenting than anything physical could ever induce. Would I prefer to have reacted differently? Sure, nothing is ever perfect, it is our strive towards perfection that defines our character. Do I regret my rash reactions? No, I am only human.

Social Issue

In my personal experiences I have yet to come across a social issue that is particularly aggravating. Especially controversial matters such as racism, bigotry, poverty, and sexism that permeates our society I find to be trivial and fundamentally impossible to solve. What I find most peculiar is that people optimistically strive to realize this notion of equality in what is an inherently unequal reality. However superficial, I find education to exemplify humanity’s desperate struggle to perfect our institutionalized and hierarchical societal structure in that it is definitely flawed but progress is seemingly unachievable and sisyphean. People are quick to point out flaws (and rightly so) in the American education system (and education in general) but they do so without actually realizing the validity of the status quo. Though the education system currently institutionalized possesses gaping and blatant flaws, it is best that we first understand its merits.

Education is arguably the foundation from which society is built—it imposes substantial influence on people’s development from youth to adulthood and is the system by which society classifies and categorizes individuals. As such, the manner in which education is carried through has substantial impact on the workings of society and gravely influences the manner in which people live. Being so important, education often is both overlooked and over-targeted. I myself have personal issues with education—one that stems from the system’s failure to efficiently relay information and over reliance and emphasis on extraversion. That being said, I still value our education system in its attempt to provide education that is able to be assessed and an education in which progress is quantifiable. A system that over-emphasizes the fostering of critical thinking and subjective, philosophical rationale is beneficial in some respects but fails in its inability to be effectively assessed. Homework is another aspect of education that is questionable in efficiency but undoubtedly necessary. Sometimes I feel homework has regressed into menial labor that does no good in developing the skills necessary to progress through life yet if applied correctly can be a beneficial tool that creates an environment that is more conducive to learning. The contrast that exists between efficient education and inefficient education exists, in my opinion, not due to a fundamental flaw in the system but due to the political, financial, logistical, and systemic limitations that inherently exists. To me it’s not a matter of the system being fundamentally defective and/or erroneous but a matter of flawed execution due to intrinsic limitations.

Weekly Letter

Wis Kojohnjaratkul

January 12, 2015

From Eleanor Roosevelt, politician, diplomat, and activist: “The purpose of life is to live it, to taste experience to the utmost, to reach out eagerly and without fear for newer and richer experience.”

From Ralph Waldo Emerson, essayist, lecturer, and poet: “The purpose of life is not to be happy. It is to be useful, to be honorable, to be compassionate, to have it make some difference that you have lived and lived well.”

Dear Mr./Ms. ________________________:

Life is intriguing. The very nature of human thought and the nebulous purpose that life serves both carry unprecedented philosophical value. The purpose for which we live is a profound conception that affects our every imaginable sphere of life. I, my reclusive philosophical self, have developed a peculiar curiosity over these abstract musings. In my world devoid of vibrancy, solitude has guided me to the sanctuary of existential contemplation. Filled with boredom and tormented by the harsh reality, I often find myself reclining to the comfort of ambiguity that is so intrinsic to philosophy. Perhaps due solely to the monotony of my own perception of life, I’ve pondered time and time again: “for what purpose do we live”? Even today I’ve dismally failed to conjure a substantive answer, however, I’m starting to abandon the notion of a unitary truth in favor of an ambiguous one.

Throughout my life my worldview, perspective, and philosophy has drastically transformed. As a child I never knew what I wanted to do, what I enjoyed doing, or even what I lived for, yet as any innocent child I still naively enjoyed the momentary happiness of everyday life and continued living with genuine smiles on my face. As the harsh reality continually pressed in on me I grew exceedingly cynical and apathetic to the nonsense of everyday life—a disposition contrary to my past cheerfulness. My strident optimism abruptly faded as I began to acknowledge my own fallibility, lacking capabilities, and dwindling hope. As such, life began to take on new, bleaker meaning with bleaker perspectives and bleaker purposes. In my monotonous reality the very purpose of life and my former optimistic perception of everyday events grew dim and gradually diminished. Nevertheless, it is in this state of absolute despair that I began to adopt a broader vision of the world. This journey towards enlightenment was refined through my experiences in English class especially through reading the Stranger and being able to witness first hand the uniqueness of human individuals and their views through discussions concerning morality and philosophy.

My strict adherence to cynical beliefs began to falter as I started to experience changes to my immediate perception of the world surrounding me. They say the only thing certain about the future is uncertainty. From my former vision everything was uncertain except for human’s intrinsic greed and selfishness. To me, the notion of success was associated with fame, wealth, and power. Life was simply a linear progression that required one to slaughter and trample upon the sympathetic sentiments of others. Success was defined—and life’s purpose embodied it.

As I carefully observed our discussion on morality and philosophy, I witnessed remarkable uniqueness in people’s responses which prompted me to question my unyielding beliefs. The Stranger provided the tipping point for this development as I had felt an uncanny feeling of resemblance and sympathy towards the apathy and “strangeness” exhibited by the protagonist. I began to question the integrity of absolute right and wrong and began to explore the very essences of morality. Through this extensive introspective journey I’ve come to truly appreciate the uniqueness and variability that is intrinsic to each individual and their pursuit of life.

The human individual is intriguing due each’s remarkable complexity. Both the physical and metaphysical conception of human life display an unparalleled level of intricacy deriving from each’s varying mentality, aspirations, and attitude. Yet, humans are fundamentally predictable, calculable and obvious—oftentimes adhering to a strict sense of logic and rational thought that is fairly consistent with societal expectations. However, whereas in some areas human apply logic, others there appears an apparent lack thereof; In greed humans exhibit uncultured barbarism and in love humans exhibit a peculiar variation of irrationality. In similar manner, all humans are different in their perception and reaction to events. Their way of life and conscious attitude is shaped by their experiences, inherent disposition, and perceived purpose. The things one holds dear, the manner in which one perceives the world and chooses to interact with it, along with the desires one has collectively produce a vibrant and unique personality. Some desire great wealth, while others contrarily express philanthropic tendencies and arguably “naive” visions. Some are religious while others are not. Some are optimistic while others are pessimistic. And some are weak while others are strong. These varying ways of life each have benefits and drawbacks—each often being criticized by those who support the other. As such, people often covet this notion of a fundamental purpose and strive to live the “optimal” way of life. To answer my original question of life’s purpose I do so with great ambiguity—that a defined unitary purpose ceases to exist and instead in its place is a variable, evolving, and even arbitrary purpose. In my opinion, purpose is not a divine destiny nor is it a static one—in fact I perceive it to be both arbitrary and dynamic. Purpose is something we make of it—a human construct that varies from individual to individual depending on time, place, manner and circumstance. It is this explicit purpose in which the way people live their lives vary and it is this purpose for which life continues to propagate. Life has no meaning until you give it one. Life can be meaningful, yet life can also be meaningless. Life can be grand, or life can be humble. Life is fundamentally empty, what you decide to do with life provides it with value and the purpose towards which you strive defines its direction.

                                            Thank you for taking your time to read this,

      Wis Kojohnjaratkul

Instructions:

1. On the blog page you created write a response to this simple question: “For what reason do you live”. Be sure to give it some thought!

ps: Don’t forget to live life to its fullest, however don’t forget to make good use out of it either—whatever that may mean for you.